Sometimes truth can hurt in ways that really hurt you when you realise that. That you did'nt realise.
A friend today told me that I had made them turn against running and that I was no longer fun to run with. The reasons were stupid callous words that I had forgotten or chosen to put in the just words spoken but with no respect to my friends. people who i have run have every right to run with someone who wants to run just like them for the fun of it and not turn it into a competitive sport.
I will never win anything and perhaps now I should just step back and reflect.
Why? Because I enjoy running with friends above everything else, just for the fun of it. And maybe I have lost that focus and need to take drastic steps to repair this aspect of my life.
I am competitive that is my own curse that needs to be cured, and perhaps today was the biggest wake up I have ever had as to how I need to change my training and become once again the person people enjoy training with.
I no longer want to train alone and stare at my reflection on a computer screen of my heart rates and pace, there is no substitute for laughing and realising that running is fun.
We take each step as a solo runner, but the best sound is hearing a friends footsteps next to you not behind you.